Time Flies

It's really late and I need to get to bed but I couldn't not post this.

I was making a collage of pictures for our Gastroenterologist. Tomorrow is our list time seeing him before the move. It's a little heartbreaking since he's the doctor we've had the longest. Not to mention how much of a driving force he has been in getting Squeaker the right treatment.

I decided I would make a card with pictures to remind him what much he has helped our Squeaker. As you can see she has grown up wonderfully. She is still skinny but puts on weight much easier than she used to. She sleeps better and the circles under her eyes are gone most days. I am continually amazed by her ability to love life one moment and the next be in full meltdown mode. I guess that comes with the 4 year old territory. oye...

Overall while sorting pictures and deciding what I wanted to use I couldn't help but be a little sad. Squeaker is growing up so fast. She always had a great personality but is now healthy enough to share it and tell us what she is thinking. Squeaker always wanted to be on the go and still does I don't know how she goes to far on so little sleep. Chemically I know it's the adrenaline in her system but I still think she is one of her super powers.

Mostly I was thinking about how much I love being her mom. Sure it's hard some days in general I love it. And honestly I love it more now than when she is an infant. Some of it I'm sure is there is less stress and more sleep. But I think a lot of it has to do with just getting to know her. The real Squeaker. Her thoughts, ideas, the stories she tells, and her laughter. What a sweet laugh to go with a sweet smile.

With all the crazy going on in our lives right now it was nice to take a few minutes and just remember how blessed we are. We have love, laughter, and a fantastic daughter.

The Crazy Continues

I had very much intended to write a post in May. Sadly I missed that deadly. It feels as if May blew up in my face.
May 1st- My laptop died and we had to run out and by a new one. I am now using Windows 8. I am not a fan! Thankfully Windows 10 should be launching soon and I qualify for the free up grade.
May 2nd- The BAKE! The Baby And Kids Expo was my first time working the Juice Plus+ table. I spent all day talking to people about what Juice Plus+ is and how it can help the body. Squeaker stayed with Trey all day. A little scary for me but we all made it just fine.
May 5th- I finally breakdown and call the sleep doctor. For that 2-3 weeks prior Squeaker had been waking up at 12-1am and being awake for 2-3 hours. Yes folks that was as miserable as it sounds. We tried everything we could think of and it wasn't helping. Which meant it was time to call the doctor. The doctor thought about it for a day and then changed her Clonodine. It's now 1/2 Tab in the afternoon, 1 Tab at bed and 1/2 Tab 4-5 hours later. The goal being to get Squeaker back to sleep as quickly as possible. Not only does it get her more sleep but it helps re-train her brain. So far it's been going well. It's been a month and already she doesn't need that third dose every night.
May 7th- Left for Indiana. 7 HOUR DRIVE!!!! Stuck in traffic for 2.5 hours!!!
May 9th- The wedding! A sweet quiet little ceremony followed by a private luncheon. The full reception was planned for later when more of the family could come.
May 10th- Mother's Day. Drove to Nell and Jim's new house. It's wonderful to have them within 2
hours. We look forward to seeing them more often.
May 11th- Spent 3 hours re-writing my resume. And started applying for jobs close to my parents house. I'd already been applying in Alabama for 2 months with no luck. I figured it couldn't hurt.
May 15th- Started to get sick. Trey had already had flu symptoms for 2 days. Mine presented more as a sinus problem.
May 18th- Made it home in a normal 5 hours. Wahoo!
May 20th- Took Trey to get have some medical tests done. We've been waiting months for these tests.
May 21st- Full blown sinus infection and swollen lymph-nods, even took a nap by myself. What a gift.
May 22nd- I was notified of a job interview back in Indiana. For the following Thursday.
May 23rd- Very busy day and forgot it was my brother's birthday. #awfulsister
May 25th- Memorial Day. Our plumbing stopped working. The kitchen sick, the dishwasher, the laundry were all not draining properly. Just dandy. The day was so crazy we forgot to do Squeaker's infusion.
May 26th- Plumbing was fixed and I was able to start doing laundry so I could pack for Squeaker and I to go back up north. Trey was going to stay behind to take care of the animals.
May 27th- Took Trey to the doctor because he still wasn't better and his results were in. All normal... annoying. Had some lunch, drove Trey home and then Squeaker and I hit the road. 8 hours later we made it.
May 28th- Have my interview. It's actually a direct hire, so pretty much if you show up you are hired. So I have a job!!! Wahoo! Means we are moving. I don't know when the job starts yet so the moving plans are still up in the air.
May 31st- Drive around the area to see what places are safe to live.

Can you see why I feel like May blew up?? It's a little nuts.

As for June so far the crazy continues

June 1st- I was getting ready to go home when I get an e-mail to go interview for an even better job in Indiana. Wahoo! I decide to stay one more day.
June 2nd- Have the interview, pack the car, drive home, mow the lawn, pull some weeds, make dinner and do infusion for Squeaker.
June 3rd- Get an e-mail from job #1 that training starts June 10th. I have to option of waiting until the next training class but it's not scheduled yet. I became physically ill thinking about trying to move in a week. I passed on this training. 5 minutes after I decided to pass I get a phone call from job #2. This is a better job for our family. Better hours, more steady work, I wouldn't be on my feet all day. And it would allow me work around Squeaker's appointments. Well, I was offered the job. I do have to be up north to sign some
paperwork on June 10th, but the training doesn't start until July 26th. Plenty of time to pack and move.

Now we are busy packing the house, stripping wall paper, and making plans to move. Life is just a little nuts. But it's looking pretty good.

If Medical Issues Were College Professors

A few days ago I was thinking about how we just can't seem to get rid of the Reactive Airway Disease. For some reason my brain started comparing medical issues to college professors. This is the conversation I came up with. Yes I know, I'm a little strange. ENJOY!


Me: Well Hello Professor Reactive Airway Disease. RAD how are you doing?
RAD: Hello LR. I'm doing well. Glad to finally be here.
Me: Did you have a good winter holiday???
RAD: I did. It was nice to kick back and enjoy some family time.
Me: That's great.  Winter was pretty calm around here. Had to handle a few problems from the GI Department. Professor Gastroparesis decided to shut down the department without telling us. Caused some communication problems that set us back a few days. And of course Dr. Hizentra. For a Professor that only works one day a week she sure can cause a lot of problems. Two weeks ago she even had a breakdown. It's hard to lay the blame on her.  As I'm sure you remember that getting the Immune Department to do anything is nearly impossible; and she can only get in the lab once a week. I'm sure it's stressful. But honestly there wasn't much out of the ordinary around here.
RAD: Well I'm glad to hear your break was normal. But I'm ready to start the new semester. I have big things planed.
Me: You're ready to get back to work you say? Well... um... the Medical Board wants to close down your lab.
RAD: Why?
Me: Well with Professor Laryngomalacia gone we figured you'd want to move on to. He was your mentor. And a real force for disruption. From the very beginning he just kind of barged in and set up his lab. The Medical Board just figured we could close down the Disruption Lab and let the Respiratory Department run its self. After 4 years the Respiratory Department has a learned plenty about handling disruption and difficulty.
RAD: I think I have a lot to teach them without Dr. Laryngomalacia. He focused a lot on the upper airway. I want them to learn disruptions in the lower airway. Maybe even work more with the sinuses.
Me: We were hoping to let the athletics lab expand. And Lower Airway Disruption Lab will really slow down their work.
RAD: It's true that Athletics Labs and Disruptions Labs rarely get along. And Dr. Laryngomalacia was very hard for to work with. Especially for the Athletic Lab. Even the GI Department has issues with him. But I think, no, I know I can do better.
Me: I'm sure you can. Many places have dual Disruption/Athletic labs. But we aren't sure that we want to go that direction.
RAD: Well. I have a 5 year contract and I'm on track for tenure.
ME: That's true. We were thinking maybe you could take a paid sabbatical for the next year. Till your contract is out. The Medical Board is thinking that allergies maybe coming, and you could work in their lab. If we can get the Immune Department up and running properly I'm sure we will still need a consulting Airway Disruption Lab. It wouldn't be full time but it would be steady work.
RAD: You know as well as I do that Disruption Labs are getting harder and harder to find. Especially ones as active as this one. This Lab has slowed down some but there is still daily work to be done here. It is fantastic for training and research. In short I deny your offer. I will stay. I've made up my mind. I had all winter to think about it. I'm ready to take over the lab on my own.
Me: You know this will upset President Squeaker and the Medical Board. They had plans to spend more time with the other departments and working out their problems.
RAD: I know but I love it here. I think there is so much I can teach and do. I know I am probably your least favorite Professor but I am very good at what I do. And I want to keep doing it.
Me: Well. Okay. Then can ask a personal favor?
RAD: Sure you can ask.
Me: Please work with the athletic department.  President Squeaker was really looking forward to a full and active summer. And well, since she doesn't really understand your department I'm the one that gets yelled at. I know that the yelling can expedite your research it is hard on the rest of us. So please try to work with them.
RAD: I'll try. Promise.... now let me tell you about my plans for the up coming semesters.
ME: Ya know what. I think at this point I'd rather it be a surprise.
RAD: Okay. Fine by me. But it's going to be a great summer. I'll see you later.

Best and Worst

     Sometimes just catches up to you. No matter how hard you try to be happy and see the good in the world. Every once and a while you just get hit with sorrow.
 

   Last Thursday was a girls night out. I love these. Usually we just meet up at a Laura's house, hang out in the basement, talk and eat food. And it not just chit-chat. We talk about our lives, tell hilarious stories, talk about our opinions, overall really get to know each other better. Seriously something we need to do more often than the every 7 months we are averaging right now.
     The night started out fantastic. We had a Usborne book party first, and books, hello, so much fun. After a couple hours of pouring over books we just switched into talking. It's what we are there to do. Large groups, small groups, back to one group it just flows as gentle river. And man do we laugh. I just can't explain how uplifting it is to hang out with these awesome woman. It is the best night I'd had in a long time. I was thinking about leaving because it was the time I told Trey I'd be home. I didn't want too, I was having so much fun. Then it hits...
     I get a text. From my best friend Spammers. Yes I call her Spammers. She has had to take her son to the hospital. With is severe allergies trips to the ER aren't uncommon but this wasn't the ER. This was being admitted. This was going to require blood work, a CT scan and maybe an MRI in the morning. My heart just sank. I shut down. He'd been having some health issues lately and it's just heart breaking for me to not be there for Spammers. But Colorado is just too far away....
     I get another text. This one is from Trey. Squeaker is having a hard time falling asleep. She is asking for mommy. Trey says they are fine but it makes me feel like a crummy mom. I'm not there when my baby wants be. Even though I know I need the night away, it still hurts. Now I'm really emotionally distraught. I don't want to leave because the idea of driving seems like too much. But I know I need to get home soon, mostly because morning comes way too fast. So I manage it sit up in the giant arm chair I'm lounging in. Laura has the best furniture.
     Others are starting to make like they are leaving, which in girl world means we will probably standing up talking in front of the door for another 30-45 minutes before we actually leave. Since everyone else is kind of moving I start to move a little more too. Amber notices I'm all of a sudden very down and asks me what's wrong. I tell her about the texts I got and for some reason I just start crying. Not like big ole sobs, but I'm weeping, I have tears coming out. It's making me feel really uncomfortable. I am not a big fan of crying. I don't care how I look, or what I sound like, I just don't like feeling out of control of my own  emotions when I cry.
   

So here I am telling my sad story, crying and just feeling miserable during what was 10 minutes ago the best night I had months. It went from best to worst that fast. Before I know it, it's going back to best again. Amber hops up from her sit and gives me a giant bear hug. Just wraps her arms around me and I feel loved. I feel safe. I feel that it's okay to hurt. Amber tell me it's all okay. That sometimes life is just hard.
      I pull myself together and stand up. Seriously I have to get home soon. I talk for a few more minutes with some others and just get back to being happy. Then I get a text from Trey than Squeaker is out and he asked me to be home before 2am, it's only 11 at this point. I start to feel better. After then end of a really funny story I see a few others leaving so I leave with them. As we round the corner of the house and head down the driveway Stacy comes up the driveway asking who's gold van is on the hill. I say mine and Stacy tells me that her sister Brooke is touching my van with hers.
     I just burst out laughing. I get on the road and sure enough there is Brooke standing on the brake in her van our bumpers touching every so slightly. In fairness Laura lives on a very steep hill. Brooke had just not given herself enough "roll space" for when she would change gears. And in Brooke's defense she had flown in from Denver that morning, and she is pregnant. Tired is an understatement in her case today.  I'm just laughing like crazy at this point. And I ask Stacy "Why are we letting the tired pregnant woman drive?" Both Stacy and Brooke start laughing. No one was hurt, the cars are fine and seriously it was the perfect ending to my up and down night. I get in my car and drive home.     
     It was up it was down, it was everywhere in between. It wasn't my best girls night out but it sure was a memorable one.